Because Free Shipping
We understand. You're a bit of a bike fanatic. You carefully chose a cool item or two and you want to check out. But the total is a buck or two shy of an Andy Jackson and you're wanting that free shipping, right?
This is your lucky day.
For the person who lives for the deal, we present The Great Equalizer. The Product On Which We Barely Break Even. The Story You Will Tell Your Friends.
This understated piece of extruded aluminum can hold your bike key. It can pop open a beer. It can buy you free shipping. Because orders $30 or more get free shipping. And this is the least expensive item at Timbiketu that can get you there.
Does your cart total $29.05? $29.72? $29.99? Click that big, bright "Add to Cart" button above.
Boom. FREE shipping on your ENTIRE order.
The color you will receive is: RANDOM.
Heed this fair warning: While our little friend makes shipping magically disappear on $30+ orders, it has the opposite effect on orders that total $29.99 or less.
In Case You Don't Get It
Your order total BEFORE adding this item needs to be at least $29.01 to get free shipping on your entire order. Yay! FREE shipping!
In Case You STILL Don't Get It
If you go to checkout and your order is less than $30, you will pay a shipping charge. If this item is part of that order, and your total is still less than $30, you will pay shipping. The idea is to beat the system by ordering this thing to get your order to $30 or more so you don't have to pay for shipping.
What If You Don't Want This Bottle Opener?
Cool. Don't buy it.
What If You Can't Make Up Your Mind?
Some people like to look at it this way: "Can I open a beer with $2 ... $5.50 ... $8 in shipping? No. Could I open a beer with this thing? Yes. I will buy the bottle opener."